Finding a Heartbeat

One of the first things that elementary school music classes teach Kindergartners and First Graders is how to keep a steady beat.  This is fundamental to all rhythmic learning, so it is stressed early.  Learning how to clap their hands, pat their knees, or stamp their feet are good physical ways to imprint this skill.

As a musician, I find that 60 beats per minute is a favorite, comfortable tempo.  I think that may be because 60 beats per minute is also a good resting heart rate.  A good heart rhythm (steady beat) and heart rate are indicators of good health.  The heart is a vital physical organ.  But, the term “heart” can also refer to one’s soul or spirit.  Spiritual health is just as important as physical health, so care should be taken with both.

Recently, George started looking for a stethoscope that he purchased shortly after his heart surgery.  Neither one of us had thought much about this, but within the last couple of weeks, he just had to find it.  I wondered if he was looking for assurance that his heart was still functioning well after he had open heart surgery–a quadruple bypass and an aortic valve replacement in 2004.  When we moved in 2014, I’m sure it was packed into a box and moved with us.  However, we have searched everywhere in our small condo and it has not been found.

A couple of nights ago, he became quite distressed that the missing stethoscope had not been found, and became tearful.  He had been sitting in his recliner resting for a while, so I did not immediately understand what caused his tears.  Since I knew he had been “puttering” around the house in search for something, I asked:  “What’s wrong?  What are you looking for?”  His response was “for my life.”  Then it hit me.  His old life, the one where he could hike, go kayaking, go camping, canoeing, and fishing, was lost.  He was searching for it.  I guess he was looking for his heart.  It wasn’t really about the stethoscope.

I do not share his concern that his physical heart may not be in good shape, but I do fear that Parkinson’s has sapped his spirit.  Depression is a common problem for people with Parkinson’s.  Therefore, it is arguably more important to deal with depressive symptoms than it is to treat the physical mobility issues.  If the body is willing but the spirit is weak, trouble ensues.  George’s psychologist is just as important to his health as his neurologist.

We continue to search for a heartbeat.